Little Old Men

Have you ever had one of those days? You know, the kind where you don't want to speak to anyone unless you speak to them first, only want to see a few select people, and otherwise just want to be left alone? That was my day today. To say that I was a crankster and a half is TOTALLY an understatement.

Today was my first day facing the real world since late Friday afternoon. I'm rarely sick, but my entire head got infected (OK, maybe not my ENTIRE head...my brain was fine. Although some might argue that it's never fine, but that's another story for another day, I digress. Anyway, everything located under the brain and above the goozle-you know, the little hang downey thing in the back of your throat-was under attack by germs!). Fever! I got the fever, not the kind for more cowbell. And when I run a fever, you know it's bad. Like bad for anyone who dares to come within a 29 mile radius of my whiney, grouchy, needy, please give me a hug (but don't you dare touch me unless I ask you to) little butt.

After three days of my feet barely skimming the floor, I had to get up, shower, wash my hair, and get dressed in something other than a t-shirt and elastic-waisted pants of some sort. (Yes, I slept 18 plus hours each day, and I'm kind of proud of myself...that's record-setting sleep for me. All except for last night, and the steroid shot was in FULL effect. I felt like Elf. I might have gotten a full 30 minutes.)

So in true Jody-lack-of-sleep-fashion, I slept in as late as I could before rolling out of bed and dragging myself to the gym to teach yoga at 5:15 am. If y'all know me at all...you know I am NOT a morning person. Not in the least. In fact I am SO not a morning person that I have a special coffee mug at my mom's house featuring Grumpy (you know, one of the Snow White's little pals), accompanied by a definition that more or less calls me ill-tempered in the mornings. I drink out of the that cup proudly!! And I get a little irritated, on top of the already morning-grouchiness, if anyone else uses my mug while I'm at my mom's. It's mine!!  Keep your grubby mitts off. Y'all get the idea.

Anyway, back to the story. I was grumpy because it was the first time I'd had to get out of bed since Friday. I didn't sleep well at all last night. But all was well with the world when I made it to yoga on time and saw some of my favorite morning people...seriously, I love my Wednesday morning class. They keep me on my toes and make me smile sleepy-headedly. That smile quickly faded as I made my way back home. I had to go to work...like my REAL job. I started thinking of all the things I had to do when I actually made it to my office. I hadn't answered emails since Friday. There would be hundreds. And phone calls, too!! And then it hit me: I had an 8 am meeting. There's nothing worse than sitting through a meeting when you know you have a bazillion other things you could be doing. Oooooh, I was getting extra grumbly.

And don't even get me started on what steroids will do to your body. I tried on everything in my closet and felt like the little teapot, short and stout. So I settled on some boy-cut pants and a baggy sweater, even though the temperature was forecasted to be a balmy 90 degrees (and it didn't disappoint). I topped it off with some heeled sandals, you know, to lengthen my legs and make me appear less "stout" today. I was a hot, sweaty mess all day long!! My office felt like a greenhouse, I was having massive hot flashes (thank you medication!), and I'm pretty sure my deodorant may have worn off somewhere around noon.

Finally, it was time to leave the office for the day! But I couldn't go straight home. I had to run errands that I hadn't done since I was lounging in bed eating ice cream for days on end. Plus this weekend just happens to be Bikes, Blues, and BBQ in Northwest Arkansas. It's an event that funds great organizations that help our community. But I wasn't feeling it today. Bikers were everywhere!!! I didn't want to be cautious of bikes on the road. I didn't want to be a courteous driver. I just wanted to get my junk done and get home! Eventually I made it to my last stop. Aldi. The cheap grocery store! Because 1) it's on the way home and I don't have to turn into traffic (Mama don't laugh if you're reading this, I know I make fun of you for this all the time), and 2) because yellow and red bell peppers were on sale, and that rarely happens!

So I whizzed in, mall-walked across the parking lot and beat a couple of slow-pokes through the front door, charged toward the produce section, and there he stood. Parked behind his buggy. Barely moving. A little 90-something year-old man dressed in a little-old-man-plaid-button-down was all that stood between me and the peppers. I silently grumbled to myself, thinking 'Why? Why does this ALWAYS happen to me? I just want to go home. Maybe I can reach over him without knocking him over. Maybe I could just squeeze in next to him and give him a nudge.' I swear he must have read my mind because he slowly turned toward me and asked in the sweetest voice, "Am I in your way?"

Ugh. Of course I had to say no and tell him to take his time or else I would have looked like an impatient little brat. He smiled, slowly looked down at my shoes, and asked, "Can you dance in those high heels?" I was a little unsure how to respond. So I told him it depended on what kind of dancing it was. As soon as those words came out of my mouth, he let go of the buggy, and I felt a soft, wrinkly hand grab mine. He twirled me around so quickly in the produce aisle that I'm pretty sure I almost landed on my rump. Literally, my head was spinning. Because you know, infected from the brain down...balance problems. It wasn't at all because God gave me two left feet (on a good day).

With my head still spinning, I looked up and noticed that everyone within viewing-range of us was watching this spectacle unfold: some smiling, some looking at us like we had both lost our marbles. One of them happened to be a parent of students I'd known for years. I wasn't sure what to say or how to react. I mean it's not every day that you see your kids' high school counselor dancing in the produce aisle with a little old man, right? So I just smiled and jokingly said, "I guess you never know what counselors do when they leave school for the day," and smiled all the way through the check-out line.

On a day that I was in such a rotten mood and probably hadn't sincerely smiled since 6:15 am-ish, this little man filled my soul with joy!! He didn't know he did it. Or maybe he did. Maybe he knew just what I needed somehow.

PS: I think angels exist, disguised as little old men in grocery stores. Read this blog from almost 6 years ago, if you don't believe it. https://ontheedgeofarkansas.blogspot.com/2011/06/old-men-make-me-smile.html

PSS: In case you're wondering, three days without washing curls like mine almost resulted in the dreads I've always wanted. Twenty-five years too late.

PSSS: One of my all time favorites. May we all stay forever young.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2p84Xdx8ck